Posted in changes, family, life, personal

The post about parents

My last post was related to more and more millennials living at home. Mostly because parents let them stay there, but also because society says its ok to keep them there. I did read one person on Twitter who said something like: “That’s disgusting.” in response to more young people moving back home. But, what about in Europe? Depending on your home situation of course, living at home can maybe take a toll in the long run but it should not be “disgusting” in the least bit but a place to feel comforted and supported. I could go on about the topic for days and days, but that’s not what this post is going to be about. I wanted to come back and write about parents in general. Yeah, i get that not everyone has them or even a full set of them. But, hey just because you might live with both doesn’t mean their perfect either. Of course understandably, they are not terrible beings either. The heart of a parent probably lies somewhere in caring more and pretending to care less.

That doesn’t really make sense because I didn’t word it right, but they either care or they don’t. No in between with these folks. Maybe they give you money or maybe they don’t and maybe they care about your achievements (mom’s always will if no one else) or maybe they they just don’t give a damn. They are though these people that want to hear from you and know what’s going on in your life because it interests them. You can make them proud at any age.

Stepping away from the sappiness, let me just say that my parents are pretty positive in terms of making sure that I succeed and go forth.

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Maybe that sounds cheesy, but I’m being real here. They only want the best and though they might be the harshest (AT THE SAME TIME as being the best critics, like come on who else can do this?) In reality, parents want success and though they might not be successful they want you to be. Don’t turn down encouragement. That’s just weird. When we get older, I think we realize that we were mean as teens (well, the nice people anyway) and start to take into account what our parents have told us.

I’m going away to live in a big city that I don’t know a whole lot about just because.

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I need to and my parents understand. It’s hard to let go, but you know that you need to yourself (maybe more so sometimes). It’s hard to let go. It seems sometimes that mom’s are easier than dad’s at this, but maybe it different for everyone. In my experience, my dad (if he had it his way) I would never leave him and stay with him forever.

Good job to my dad (the bond between a father and daughter is strong) for holding out the past month while my sister has been away. It’s been a month. Like I mean, there’s been some emotions and stuff.

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If you’re reading this, then maybe you miss or yearn for your parent right now. It’s ok, give him/her a call. They won’t mind.

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Posted in family, life

In times of strife, we must look at the happy moments.

So, it’s me again. Desperately trying not to be a loser but sorta kinda failing horribly. Luckily, though I am signed up to write for at least 4 websites and organizations so I guess I better get to it…tomorrow. Yeah, that happened.

It happens all the time. But, I’m trying to ignore it try to make room for more exciting venues. Example: “Hey, you! (me) It’s summer, be happy and stuff!” Or, just go and watch my little sister graduate from high school. A proud moment. I’m glad she made it this far, but today’s teens are so much more different than they were when I was in high school. The internet has taken over everyone’s life and has made many leave so many tasks undone, not really procrastination but just laziness. A girl who gave one of the speeches today reminded us all that we spend much too much time online, this sparked a conversation about technology and the effect it has on our productivity which is really something that should be an everyday conversation. We’re all affected. Technology kills us all, but the ones’ that succeed are the one’s that have learned to use it in moderation and understand its limits.

I’m fairly happy currently (not that anyone cared). Hoping for a significant life change, but until then I’m ok with celebrating the occasional happy moment and the times when family are most important.

The love from within is the love which truly matters.

Also, I like using gifs. More gifs in more posts is what I say! And pictures, if I can! Because, well, “you only live once but sometimes once is enough.” ~ Mae West.

Posted in changes, family, life

Family is Everything

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They say family is everything. If this is true, why do our families sometimes make us feel as though we are crazy or helpless. Depends on your family or even what your version of family is. These days it can be hard to separate truth from fiction, or really life from fantasy. What matters is finding yourself among the remains of what is left of your former self to build a better you.

I’ve been through a lot in life. I’m still going through a lot, it’s not going to be over anytime soon. The struggles and pain are what make me though. I just have to keep telling myself that I am not alone, even though it feels like that and I don’t really know if I even believe what I tell myself anyway. I think I’m going through some kind of twenty-something crisis. Possibly a millennial thing, I don’t really know. Life can be a blur sometimes, in that everyday just collapses into another and they stop having meaning. But, the point is to find meaning out of life not necessarily every day.

If you have a good family, with people who love and support you then this is where they come in. Your family is like no one else. Like no other group of people you will encounter in your life because they don’t actually care about what you do or who you want to be. They love you for you. Whoever your family is or whoever you call your family, don’t let them out of your life. They exist to be there for you and your are there for them. It’s how the cycle works. No one understands why someone who grows up in a small town never comes back, it’s because there was nothing there to begin with. A person only comes back to the place that is home because there is love there. There is no judgement there or stares. It’s not holing up in your parent’s house, no its a collective presence of people. Not really all in one place, but the presence is felt at once anyway.

So, we all have to work on ourselves. We’re not perfect beings. No one said we were. An example: A girl cries as her mother reaches out to hold her, resistant of any touch and  scared to feel that love again. Unaware at the same time that while her heart is breaking that the love she really needs has been right next to her the entire time. At this moment, the heart inside the girl begins to give out and she closes her eyes and begins to cry once again hopeless while hoping that there is a future that is still bright for her out there. Then, her mother looks at her with concern knowing that her daughter is not a child anymore and she too begins too cry because she wants to help her but doesn’t know how. This is what happens when we are afraid to open our hearts to the one’s who only want to love us (side note: this is a random story and has nothing to do with me).

The most I can say is that everybody has their problems. Every family might have their problems, but if it matters to you to have them in your life then fight to have them. Love will prevail. Whatever your going through or how crazy your family is, it cannot be as crazy as this family.

Best to all reading and keep smiling, if you can it lightens the heart a bit.

“One way to get the most out of life is to look upon it as an adventure.” –William Feather (the quote of the day for April 27)

Posted in family, life

Following in a Shadow

It’s the start of another week and the end of another. What does this mean? Still trying to find ground, but not being unproductive. Most of what I do with my time is writing, reading, and studying. There’s still a lot to consider and much to think about. Most people are off trying to watch something, write something, achieve something, or make a living doing something that is not terrible (hard task actually). Anyway, I heard or read somewhere once that all of us are leaders in our own way just trying to get others to see what we have to present.

This might be true, yet there are still so many of us not sure of what we want. To say and commit to making change is easy, but creating and making that change last is a difficult task. Especially for someone that is not very good at everyday interaction (awkward turtles, I’m looking at you). Do you ever feel as though something or some force is preventing you from your goal? Something to be passed through first or some test to be undertaken to reach a goal? It’s always the same, goals never change for some people. You might be tired of people telling you to “think outside the box”, when you need to be confined to your one box in order to find a way out to the world. Is this true though?

Those not sure where to turn should know that friends and family are the best source of support. In depression, in uncertainty, in life choices it is always good to have a shoulder to cry on or to laugh on. But, most choices must still be made by you. YOU. I include myself in knowing that the choices I make now will reflect my future life, because I am still young and want to learn more about life. Sometimes, I feel as though the place I am trying to get to will never open it’s doors to me or that my family will not see me the same way as my sister. This is not true, but one begins to feel as though there are not their own person if the accomplishments of another continue to grow leaving one to feel empty and cold inside. I couldn’t be more proud, but at the same time I wonder; Is this it for me? I don’t want it to be, but I’m not like others my age. I do not know where life is taking me. OK, I am very much like people my age.

The point is no one has to be this way. It does not have to be so hard to enjoy life. To realize that you actually have a shadow and are a real person with goals and ambitions. It’s perfectly ok to give up on yourself sometimes (I’m convinced that my sister does sometimes as well) but don’t let it stay with you forever. That would amount to nothing but heartache and frustration. Follow others so that you can one day lead, in your own special way.