I’m thinking lately about what it means to be a good person.
Am I a good person?
Is anyone really a good person?
The feeling you get when you realize you might be doing something bad washes over you in waves. The tide of judgement comes rolling in whenever this happens and you look down on yourself once again.
You say you’re a person with morals, with boundaries but you don’t always know what those are. You know what it means to have these things, but not necessarily what it means to have these things taken away from you. The promise of shelter and love is almost a given, that you forget it exists.
You pull out the weapon. It’s shiny and new, it’s easy to buy these days just head to the local shop. It stares at you in the face, your reflection just barely glinting through. It would seem as though you might have made a mistake about what you want. About what you need. You don’t know right away that the sirens are for you, but you listen and you know. And you cry and you nod.
Get help, seek help. Remember that you’re not alone is the main advice I would give to anyone searching in their hearts for why they need to live such a routine life.
But wait. Then you remember. Not everyone has these same luxuries, has these same thoughts flooding through their head. Not everyone feels as though they will always have support in anything they choose to do.
The feeling of knowing what you need to know and do is not always apparent. It’s sometimes hidden away, waiting for you to do what is right.
It’s a known fact that hard things are hard. When faced with difficulty, it seems as though we try to forget it exists and harbour negative feelings in our heads. Just letting those thoughts permeate through whatever we are doing or trying to do. Failure becomes not an obstacle, but an absolute.
Despite setbacks, I think you owe yourself a round of applause. Go ahead, clap for yourself. I’ll wait.
Don’t forget that when you downplay the things you could not do, you diminish what you can do.
I’m not sure of your role or job, but you don’t have to let yourself feel as though you need to do it all. Yes, that is what most people say these days especially those that advocate for more mindful thinking or more productivity with less stress. Being productive means different things for different people. Maybe you, the person hoping to find some quiet inspiration reading this today, need to adjust your productivity levels. At least, find a way to know what is productive for you and why.
These are not just the small things. These are all bigger actors playing the role of motivator in your life. The actions you take make you an asset, good or bad. The values you seek make you honest or fair. Maybe you’re still seeking out what makes you valuable, however those that admire and think you are worth it will tell you otherwise. I will tell you otherwise and I don’t even know you.
So keep going. Remember to keep thinking of why and what your why is in regards to your life. It’s not always personal, but usually it is.
What it means to do that is not always an easy road. Sometimes you have to give up the things that you enjoy in order to begin doing the things that you know will lead to great joy . Maybe this means you need to give up on a great job in favor of an amazing opportunity. In a time when doors are slowly opening for you, will you close the door or open it?
Since we’re talking about me here, I’ll open the door. Not without a little pondering first though. A little thinking on my part that is what I’m doing even worth my time? It’s one of those killer thoughts, that keeps you up at night staring at the ceiling and around your room, squinting in the dark at various things in your room. So, do I take the leap of faith or pretend that it will be fine if I do not?
The worst that can happen is that I will fail and fail miserably. This is not a hypothesis, its a fact. The greatest that can happen is that I will just barely succeed, because uncertainty is the brink of all meltdowns. Someone might be on the brink of one soon, if they don’t figure out how to help everyone at the same time.
Isn’t that what all the good people want? To help everyone? Well, help most people anyway (we can’t help them all; a fact that must be acknowledged). I want to help those that feel like they need help but don’t know how to ask for it. I want to give others the push they didn’t know they needed, because it will also give me that push.
Since I am still giving myself that push to push others, I will make myself do the hard things. The hard things are hard for a reason. In times of difficulty, I’ll work hard to stay strong.
I’ll work hard to make sure I am still doing what makes me happy and what I truly love.
There are good people and there are bad people. There are occasionally those that are in-between, however they are usually on the verge of going in either direction.
I like to imagine people with their flaws as part of them, not aside from them. Understanding humans complexly is a rare thing for an ordinary person to decipher, however this does not mean one cannot try.
The problem is that every person is different. Or maybe this is a great challenge or triumph. Why would anyone want to be the same anyway? might be what most people think, including you reading this. The fact of the matter is that people want to be lifted up, to be able to understand what makes others around them tick, grow weak, cry or feel pain. You might think you know those around you best, however it is those around us that we can sometimes know the least.
Personal life vs. private life are not same when it comes to conversing with an ordinary person we do not know well. We might share details such as “I like to ride bikes, go for runs, and draw in my free time.” A person could also say “I enjoy eating, shopping, sleeping, or spending time with family and friends.” What about those cracks though? Will you ever know that Karen from work is struggling in her marriage? No, you might not not even if you were her neighbor. Will you ever know that someone lives on a friend’s house and has been for several months or that your an achieving young girl or boy accepted into Ivy League schools is going through a deep depression and feels like ending it. Lastly, you might never know how your parents really feel about each other and whether they are happy with their lives.
So be a good person if you have to be something. Be a person that knows that pushing themselves is not always going to lead to anything substantial. At times, stress melts away any productivity you might have been aiming for.
Be well, stay well. Reach for a helping hand. Yes, the hands are ready to pull you in tight.
It’s a nice time of year. Not really, but what do you want me to say here?
Every day might be a struggle, but I’m enduring it.
Every day might be more unproductive, but I’m managing it.
Every day I might be moving farther away from the person I wanted to be.
Every day I might not eat the foods that I want.
Every day I wake up and decide to do things and usually try to.
Despite the small setbacks of daily life, I am fairly certain that I am doing just fine. If I am at all honest, it would be to say that I am beyond fine. I am great. Not most days, internally (in the heart), but externally I can make those faces that tell others the story they would like to hear. Maybe some more than others.
It could be that I hear from an old friend today. Or that I uncover the reason behind why I am not doing what I set out to do. The reason behind why I am slow on many projects. I take my time, I think, I analyze, I discuss, and still think it important to carve out time for me. I focus on focusing on myself but then forget about the other projects. The irony is not lost on me.
So today I will be great. Maybe not a GREAT great, but up there. Quite possibly, I’ll find the spark today and my brain will ignite with possibility. I can hope can I not?
I can be free to hope and to dream for as long as I wish. It does nothing to dream without understanding why you dream.
This is turning into a post with a mind of its own. Have a splendid day that is whatever you want it to be. As it should be.
“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.” –
-Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
I’d like to believe that those of you reading this actually enjoy reading. Possibly you spend a good deal of time reading even. Maybe you just got some new audiobooks (yes, these can count).
Or maybe not. It could be that you are failing in reading and you don’t seem to fathom why. “But I used to love reading!” is what you tell people. “I can’t seem to find the time to read these days.” Oh, so that’s what we’re going with then.
Don’t worry, I have also done this but I know that it does nothing to make me read. If I want to read, no one is stopping me from picking up a book and reading it. I love to get lost in a great story. It reminds you of the wonderful writers, most of who are unknown, that have not given up on their dream. If they haven’t, who says you should?
Sure, you might say you don’t want to write but you could change your mind one day. You might do something amazing and people will pay you great sums to write a memoir. Maybe they’ll make a movie about your life that is then not your life anymore. Anyway, a bit of a far reach but just know that you cannot stop trying because it might be too hard.
Besides anyone can self-publish, as anyone who writes on WordPress or other blogs knows though the likelihood of writing the “Next Great American Novel” is probably not achieved through your own means. As much as you might try.
Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read. Thanks for remembering that “hey, reading isn’t so bad after all!” That’s right, it’s not so bad. How, about we all try doing more of it?
Salagadoola mechicka boola Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo It’ll do magic, believe it or not Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo
The everyday life you lead is probably not exciting, nor is it magical in any way. You would like to say you do so many cool things all the time. Things that make you feel like you are doing something worth your time. Of course, most of what you do is always worth it, but none of us see it that way because we always will want more. Will need more, will expect more, and will pursue more.
At the very least, what you can try to be is daring. Yeah, that’s a new thing you can strive for this year. No more wallowing. Yes, you wallow and it’s time to stop.
Daring in the sense that you are willing to not only go the extra step but also take a step back and right a wrong. Don’t hold grudges even if you think forgiveness is stupid. Dare yourself to walk for ten minutes a day. Dare yourself to read for ten minutes a day. Dare yourself to get off social media for twenty minutes a day. Dare yourself to not only say you’ll drink more water but actually do it, by throwing out all that La Croix or dumping it all out. You can never really run out of dares, you can just keep struggling to make yourself do them. However, that is not a failure but is admitting you have limits like most people.
I hope you do something pretty cool today. Maybe it won’t be that daring or maybe it will. Either way, I hope you feel great about it and you take the chance to better yourself in this way.
(please don’t dare yourself to steal things or kill someone).
Words: Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo from Cinderella (written in 1948 by Al Hoffman, Mack David, and Jerry Livingston).