life · personal

Still alive, but I’m barely breathing.

So, here I am writing a post 3 months later. I did not forget about this blog, but yeah things have been going on. I’m in another city than I was before. I’ve been here for over two months now and no, I haven’t been able to wrap my head around the reason why I’m here. I’m very close even to wanting to throw it all away. That’s probably one of the reasons why I find myself on tumblr and writing this blog post.

But alas, yes that is where it stands. August was an intense month. Doing all these different things I have never taken part in. It’s only getting more intense as time goes by. City hall, public and urban affairs, people and why you should care about the issues facing them. Things like this. It’s a public affairs program, so this was expected. I just feel like I’m such a small fish in a big pond. Most of my classmates have done internships or worked in such a setting (council meetings, local and possibly state events) or have a background with such matters. I do not. I am lost. But, I’m trying.

It’s a trying time. I’ll probably finish writing this and then not write another post until December. You only blog when you want to sometimes. And even then, it’s sometimes like it doesn’t even matter if no one is really listening. (Is any one reading this?)

If you’re reading this, then hey– what is your struggle? You must have something. We’re all going through something currently, we just don’t really know what that is. It will probably take time before we know what that is. For me, I already know. It pains me to say that it’s my writing (and speaking) skills that need the most work. However will I survive? Whoever would have thought that the quiet girl from a small town in the Midwest would end up not only in the third largest city in the U.S. but in a place she knows nothing about.

Small fish in a big pond indeed. 


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