It’s been an alright few weeks. I think I’m at the point where I have to think about “the after.” What that is is something related to a future career, settling down, and finding happiness in the moment.
At the current moment, I’m struggling between two schools. I don’t which one to go to. Maybe it’s not that hard of a choice, maybe I should have already made the choice awhile ago. I won’t say any names, but one school is in New York and the other is in Chicago. It’s hard because they are both good, but of course I can only go to one. This is for a masters program. Maybe I’ll just go to neither. I hate these kinds of decisions. I didn’t think I would find myself in such a position. Possibly one of the more harder decisions I’ll make in my life.
Since my mind wanders to other things, the task of just picking one thing is hard for me. There is no going back when I make the decision, so I guess I need to decide soon on what will be. I’m from a small-town and no one really wants to stay here. I’ve been here for over a year, out of school and between various writing gigs and things but I’m not sure I could do anymore of this (What this is is nothing actually). Sometimes, I’m at a loss with how to deal with people or family but I deal. I can say that doing something besides writing, reading, or smiling would not lead to good things. Working out makes me happy so if I can do that wherever I am, then I’ll be alright.
But not to bore you with my problems, I’m thinking of some creative endeavors. Alright, so it’s possible the idea is just popping into my head as I’m writing this but whatever. Writing is a good release for me. I think that saying something is easier than actually doing it.
Now to find the magic pen to erase all my worries and that glue to get unstuck (oh wait, it’s all my head..)